M.M. Panas
“Take Back the Night”
Mixed media
Inspiration piece
Muscle Memory
By JoAnn Moore
Response
I find myself
at the edge.
Teetering…
Dizzied, again, by the past
when I learned the heart has
muscle memory
if bruised so young.
For forty years I’ve tried
to find a way out of that car.
To have not trusted sooner.
But I know,
it wouldn’t have changed a thing.
Dirt roads make great adventures,
but they cannot hear you scream.
And the next day, when you went to school
and bragged to your football buddies
that your initials were
carved on my insides—
my silence was sealed.
Now, each time love tries
to find a way in—
I find myself at the edge again.
I want you to know:
…..You deserved that tree,
…..five years later,
…..when you failed to negotiate.
…..That I went to your grave
…..and danced.
…..That my first act of public
…..vandalism was carving
…..into a broken trunk:
I survived.
Love wins.
_________________________
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